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Written by contributing writer, Trina Holden.
Do you know the woman next door? Or the one across the street?
Chances are, she?s not much like you. Statistics predict she?s not a stay-at-home mom, and doesn?t have more than 2 children?if she is a mother at all. She may not cook like you, dress like you, or read the same books. And she might not even go to church.
So, why would you want to have anything to do with her?
Because we?re called to love our neighbor and we were created for community.
We as believers all-too-often gravitate towards those who are like us, thinking that the more we have in common, the stronger will be the community we enjoy. While compatibility is a significant factor in relationships, I feel we overlook another key factor:
You live on the same street. And that, sisters, is a connection that is often missed in the face of all that makes us different. Yet that one commonality?physical proximity?is another huge factor in building a relationship, and has been the foundation of many life-long friendships.
It was when we left our first home and the trailer park we?d lived in for 3 years that I became convicted that I had not been a good steward of the relationships that had?literally?been right in my backyard. Part of my delinquency was due to the natural inward focus of that first season of marriage, but I also knew I had let differences in lifestyles keep me from reaching out and building relationship with my neighbors.
At our new home, I resolved to be more faithful to God?s?commission by His grace. To step out of my comfort zone, to put forth a little effort, and see what would happen when I chose to love my neighbor. We started by hosting an open house that first fall. I made a huge pot of chili, several trays of cornbread, and we had a bonfire and music and invited everybody we knew?including the family that had just moved in across the street from us. In this group setting we enjoyed our first casual conversations with our new neighbors, and watching them walk back over the street to go home, I thought what fun it could be to have a friend who lived that close.
So, I reached out again. First just a hello across the road when we fetched the mail or were both doing yard work. Then a play date with our kids. Then dessert as families when the strawberries were ripe. For the first time in my life, I was experiencing what it was like to have a neighbor. And I liked it.
There?s something about being able to run down the driveway to borrow an egg, or sympathize over the heat wave or have someone near when the weather?s too bad to go anywhere. Opportunities to fellowship are right out the front door, instead of an hour?s drive.
And while reaching out and being willing to deepen the relationship, I discovered that, though she and I were raised differently and our lifestyles were not exactly the same, we did have other things in common?she was a believer! And we both desired to be a better wife, more loving mom, and to grow in our faith.
So, we started a Bible study together. Three or four times a month, while my kids were sleeping and hers were in school, we opened our Bibles, read a few verses and prayed and asked the Lord to speak to us. Despite our differences, the Lord had brought us together, bonded us, and revealed to me the joy He planned when He told us to ?love our neighbor?.
Lately I?ve been inspired to explore new levels of community that await at the end of my own driveway, and to encourage you to see what relationships God may have called you to in your own neighborhood. God designed us for community, but it won?t happen unless we invest ourselves.? And perhaps, while celebrating what we do have in common?the same street, weather, and postman?we?ll have opportunity to share our love, our hope, and the God that can change lives.
Little {and Big!} Ideas for Investing in Your Neighborhood Community:
- Time your afternoon walk for when kids are getting home from school or parents get home from work so you can say hello
- Share extra produce from your garden with a basket or cooler at the end of the driveway
- Organize a neighborhood garage sale
- Initiate a book study
- Plan a play date in the backyard
- Invite the locals for a bonfire or seasonal summer dessert
- Plan a family movie night
- Find your neighbors on facebook and begin the connection in the non-threatening meeting-place of social media
- Make friends with the kids first?make your yard the fun, hang-out place
- Send a personal note on a holiday or just to say hi
How have you been able to reach out to your neighbors? What has worked for you? What challenges or successes have you experienced? How do you foster community in a more rural setting? In the City? I?m still new at this and would love to hear what you?ve done! Please share in the comments!
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